27 APRIL 2020 BLOG 26 BOOK OF SONGS AUTHOR’S 2ND AUTOBIOGRAPHY
27 APRIL 2020 BLOG 26
When I discovered the greatest gift that I have to share is my presence, I had to come to understand how that would come about for me. To have empathy, compassion and love for someone else whether it is someone I know or a complete stranger, I learned from these great teachers mentioned in this book that I had to have this for myself first and foremost. Otherwise, it could never be truly for anyone else. Love for self is paramount before anyone else.
We’ve all heard you can’t give what you don’t have. No matter how much you fake this or attempt to convince yourself and others of anything different than this…you know the truth. You know your inner truth. You can feel it!
To acquire those qualities for myself, I had to release my energy through love and trust. I had to release all resistance in my life. I had to emotionally release all my books, everything I wrote, including this book, and every song I wrote and every book and song I will write ever again.
To gain the qualities I wanted for myself, I had to know that there is positive growth in my authorship, in all that I write and in all aspects of my life. I decided to find joy, abundance and prosperity in whatever it is that I am doing. And most of all, I put commitment behind every decision I make. As I wrote above, the cost is too great to stay where I know I don’t want to be. I’ve committed myself to doing the work that is necessary for my expansion, my growth, my alignment with my soul. There are no ifs or buts about it. I am committed to my decisions that are in the best interest of my highest self.
Making this commitment to myself allows me to easily make decisions. I trust my intuition. I trust my inner guidance. I can feel every decision I make. When it doesn’t feel right, I know before the decision is even made. The process of deciding is quick. It’s easy. Some decisions are made in one moment because the feeling is clear. Others are made in parts. The steps I take to answer a question are guided by how I feel. Then, I go to the next step, and then the next. In reality, I’ve learned that there are no big questions. In my experience we have been made to believe that some questions are more important or bigger than others. However, in reality, it’s a question. The level of drama that you decide to associate to it is your decision. In the moment, I have kept things in the moment. A second later is a second later. Tomorrow is another day…and so on. In a moment, you know what it is that you must do that is best for you. Unfortunately, we have been made to believe that we are to trust other people’s opinions, whether they are solicited or not, or to seek someone else’s opinion before listening to what our inner self is telling us.
I am right here, right now. That’s all I know. My internal radio is tuned to my highest self. The more I trust and do this, the better I get at it. My decisions get better and faster, without any drama. It just is. Life flows with ease, and all challenges are addressed in the same manner.
My intention is to create harmony with myself, me, Suzanne, my soul, and not with anyone else. Creating harmony with anyone else is not paramount, nor my business. I cannot control anyone else or anything that happens around me. All I can do is decide how I respond – NOT REACT – to life or anyone around me. The harmony I create for myself will and does align me with the best position, no matter the condition of my life at that time.
The intention of creating harmony with myself released me from my strongly held views that bound me to my narrow stories that kept me locked in a victim’s way of living. These narrow stories that I had been telling myself and others for years affected my life in adverse ways, keeping me off the path of least resistance, away from alignment with personality and my soul, and in fear of uncertainty in my life.
I want to be a writer so I write books. I want to be a songwriter so I write song. Whatever it is I want to do, I do it. I travelled a long journey, filled with wonderful adventures, and some not so wonderful ones as well, all valuable for my own growth, my expansion, and my attainment of knowledge and examination of my own life, before I found the courage and trust in myself to not wait for anyone else to tell me to write or do whatever it was that I wanted to do, or to not seek anyone’s opinion. If I wanted to get better at whatever I wanted to do, I sought the teachers and learned.
One of my greatest fears was uncertainty. I feared losing all that I had acquired in my life, my money, my house and friends, as well as living and dying alone, poor, on the street. I can write millions of books about how this story came about, and why I embraced such a story, and convinced myself that it would be so. However, my will to change my life, knowing the cost of staying where I was, stuck in my stories, was too great a cost to forego the life I knew was waiting for me. The life that was waiting for me was not predestined nor designed by anyone else waiting for me out there in the world. The life waiting for me was the one that I was to create for myself. The life my soul had been waiting for me to embrace.
I feared uncertainty. I lived a life with fear as my dominant factor in everything I did, and it prevented me from acting to initiate change in my life. Now…thanks to Gary Zukav’s teachings and my other teachers, I am comfortable with uncertainty. I live a life where fear is no longer a dominant factor in what I do, and nothing prevents me from acting to initiate change.
Gary Zukav’s teachings taught me to open myself up to my emerging consciousness and to know and experience that I bring this light into this world as a primary purpose of my life. I am still learning to experience fully that my primary factor is consciousness, and that I have a state of consciousness that creates the experience, the life I desire, the world I desire.
My life was based entirely on my beliefs, regardless of whether or not I was truly conscious of how those beliefs had come about. For me to change my life, I first had to acknowledge what I believed about myself and others around me, as well as about the world that I had created. This is just like peeling the layers of an onion. The examination of one’s life is not achieved in one gulp.
The levels of one’s life, the levels that make ‘me’, you the person you are in this body, is to be appreciated and recognized as a necessary layer, the next level to step up to, thereby allowing a discovery of self to happen with ease.
Love for me
I resisted love flowing to me,
A path carved to me for me.
I resisted all that flowed,
My soul always giving me small reminders.
To find my way home,
A chance at love for no one but me.
What was love to me and for me?
Hoo, La, Whoa, Whao.
A chance at love for no one but me.
Hmm, Hmm, Whoa, Whoa.
So gentle my soul touches me,
Reminding me how to find my way home.
Hoo, La Whoa, Whoa.
A chance at life to take for me,
All given to me all here for me.
Where have I been?
Why have I turned away from me?
From a life given to me,
So gentle so free.
No matter the sorrow and all its tears,
This life was given to me.
Hoo, La, Whoa, Whao.
A chance at love for no one but me.
Hmm, Hmm, Whoa, Whoa.
So gentle my soul touches me,
Reminding me how to find my way home.
Hoo, La Whoa, Whoa.
So gentle my soul pleas with me.
I release all resistance to come home,
I release all resistance to love me,
I’m finding my way home.
It’s so easy if when I tumble,
I’m figuring it out.
I now know of no other way,
For me to live my life but in harmony,
In harmony with my soul.
Love for no one but me, first me.
Then I can love you.
Hmm, Hmm, Whoa, Whoa.
Hoo, La, Whoa, La, La.
So gentle my soul touches me,
Reminding me to love me first.
I’m finding my way home.
Hoo, La, Whoa, La la.
Hmm, Hmm, so gentle my soul.
This love for me.